Love at First Sight… It’s Not Just for Fairy Tales
Love at first sight,
Some people believe in it. Some people think it’s a fairy tale. I’m here to tell you that it is very much a possibility, and it happens to people around the world, every day, millions of times per day.
Let me tell you about my first experience with love at first sight.
It started on a Wednesday at 6:00 in the morning, with a pitocin drip. It culminated at 8:31 at night, when the nurses put a brand new little girl on my chest and I looked into those tiny brown eyes, and I knew. I believed in love at first sight.
It wasn’t until many years later that I came across a quote about motherhood that felt so very true to me. Ina May Gaskin said about motherhood:
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother never. A mother is something absolutely new.”
I never knew the truth of that statement until that wonderful Wednesday night at 8:31 p.m. when the love I felt toward a complete stranger literally changed me into an entirely new creature.
Something I’ve learned since that day is that the change and transition to becoming a mother does not happen just once. When you have your second, third, fourth or etcetera child, you are transformed into the mother of two, the mother of three, and so on.
This birth of a mother happens every time a baby is born. I’ve experienced my motherly birth four times, and I can say that love at first sight doesn’t necessarily happen every time, but for me, that love always comes eventually.
My second and third children were both wonderful, but neither one had that amazing first moment, looking down into that little face and thinking “I love you. I’ve loved you for a thousand years already!”
When I was pregnant with my fourth child, I decided to do things differently than I’d done with any of my other births. I gave birth to my first three in a hospital setting with an epidural. When it came to my fourth, I wanted something different, so I found a spectacular midwife in my area and made a change to midwifery fairly late in my pregnancy.
After that birth experience I have confidently said that going with a natural birth was the best decision I’ve ever made. Before her birth I worked tirelessly on my mindset and preparing for a natural birth. It was an incredible experience and once again, like my first, when that baby and I looked into each other’s eyes we were in love.
Now I am once again reentering the process that will end with a change in me. I will change from a mother of four, to a mother of five. I will also have my first change to a mother of a boy. The day he decides to come I may have one more experience of love at first sight, or I may have another opportunity to grow into love, but either type of love this boy brings to me, it will be transformative and spectacular.
But if you ever ask me if I believe in love at first sight, my answer will be a resounding yes! It’s not just for fairy tales. I’ve experienced it on more than one occasion, and perhaps I’ll experience it again soon.
